The Sex Ed You Never Got In High School

andi haase
May 2, 2019
4 min read

Today's post is gonna get real about: SEX. If you came to college from a private religious school, you might not have even been taught this shit. If you came from a public school (myself included), you probably received a basic outline on the do's and don'ts of sex. Despite this, the American education system misses large portions of topics that can be crucial to living a healthy lifestyle in college. So, I'm here as your younger, modern Carrie from Sex and the City to discuss some important topics and maybe even *enlighten* you.

If You're Meeting Up With Someone for the First Time

Let's face it: this is a constant occurrence at almost every university to grace America's presence. Whether you matched on Tinder or got their number from a friend, it's important to think logically before you take the step in meeting (and possibly sleeping with) someone new.

1. Share your location with a close friend and have a plan. This might seem extra, but if you do happen to be in a situation where you cannot call or contact anyone, your friend knows where you are. Come up with a text code such as a pair of emojis or a key word just in case things don't feel right, and they can help you out. **Also, a reminder that if you press the iPhone lock button 5 times fast, the SOS option will pop up for emergency usage.

2. Bring condoms/dental dams. I don't care if you plan on having sex or not - when you get caught up in the moment, you probably won't be thinking about sexual health. As this is the 21st century, anyone can in fact carry their own shit (and I do recommend it) especially if you don't know the person well. Guys and girls can be just as forgetful as the rest of us, and ensuring that one of you has a form of protection will prevent stupid decisions from being made.

3. If you decide to go raw, GET TESTED FIRST. So you've been with someone for a while, things are getting serious, and they wanna get a little more intimate. You need to have a talk with your significant other and ask when the last time they've been tested is. It might be weird or awkward, but it'll be much better than explaining to them the next week that you have HPV, crabs, or another STD. If you haven't been tested in a while (or ever - there's a first for everything!) you could suggest going together. Check your community for places where testing is free, and go get checked out. Your privates will thank me later.

If You're Getting Ready and Need Some Tips

The first thing I'm about to say is the most important: WEAR WHATEVER MAKES YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE AND HAPPY! If you're going over to your guy or girl's place and you feel empowered in sweats, go for it. If you wanna put on a skirt and a crop sweatshirt, do that. If you wanna be in a tee shirt and jeans, do it. Your radiance will show in whatever you feel the most confident in, whether its dressed up or super casual.

1. Shaving is tough, please be careful. The pubic area is sensitive enough as it is, and when you're taking hair away from down there, it can cause infection or irritation if not done properly. Remember this acronym for future reference:

P - PORES gotta be relaxed and open, so take the first five minutes in the shower to get warm

E - EXFOLIATE gently with a body scrub (or get creative and DIY) to prep for shaving

N - NEVER use a dull razor or a razor with less than three blades; NOURISH follicles with either shaving cream OR conditioner (this actually works yo), and follow up with an unscented moisturizer

2. Pack some small beauty essentials to bring with you. Even if you don't think you'll need them, life calls at the most inconvenient times, and you don't wanna be rushing out of someone's dorm to meet a professor or get brunch with smelly armpits and a face full of smeared makeup. My recommendations are a small pack of makeup wipes, a mini deodorant, gum or a small bottle of mouthwash, lip balm, a few hair ties, a water bottle, a phone charger (or portable one), a second pair of underwear, and roll on perfume/essential oils/cologne. These can all fit easily into a small backpack or purse, so pack one ahead of time, and you'll have it handy for whenever.

If You Wanna Spice Things Up

This last category is the most *promiscuous* because we often don't talk about the literal SEX portion of... well... sex! Some things to take into consideration when you're getting down and dirty:

1. Explore before reaching the final destination. Don't be afraid to get to know the person's body a little before you go further. See what makes them feel the best and play around a little. Sex doesn't have to be a five minute in and out game. If you and your person are down for it, talk a little about what you like and what you don't like. Trust me, it will make the experience much better, and less awkward as well.

2. Make a playlist! Experimenting with types of music can be something fun that turns sex into something more passionate. If you're aiming for a certain vibe, find it in a few albums, queue that shit up, and turn on your speaker for some good background noise. *This is also a good option for those who are a bit noisy, as we all know college walls are thinner than paper*

Speaking of playlists, I've put a new one up that might fit your vibe ;) Go check it out above this post!

3. Use the damn lube already. If neither of you are ready down there, there are essentially two things you can do: more fooling around, or breaking out the lube. If you're still on land, you can grab a water based lube that's fragrance free. If you're in the shower, silicone lube is your best bet because it won't wash off as easy as water based lube will. *Don't use oil based lube, as it could easily rip the condom or cause irritation for sensitive skin.